overnight prayer meeting

[cindy took this shot & made it all vintage-y.]

i Y it.

YS is shivering in the picture, he was super nervous (i think) but he sang awesome.

he's like the next andy lau. seriously. what awesome vocals ;)

it was fun singing with the gang. thanks brenda for composing the harmony & kudos to kelvin & YS!

i flopped in the song, sang out of tune in the last bit but oh well, it was still a good experience and we only had that lil' time to practice!

AND as for the prayer meeting, yay, i think i deserve a pat on my back or lasting till 3am! lolx. it's been a long while since i've gone all the way.

i feel all committed again to run for the vision of God.

it's time to step out of the boat, step out in faith & do great things! let's not stay in our comfort zone anymore & begin to push ourselves.

I was telling someone the other day...

"You don't experience happiness until you know what sadness/disappointments mean"

Don't let obstacles/tribulations scare you. Be willing to take risk. Even if you don't do well, get up & try again. Persevere for there is nothing impossible with God. And when all things seem against you, focus on God. For He will provide like the way He provided Abraham with Issac at a ripe old age and how He provided the multitudes plentifold food from just 5 loaves & 2 fish.

Everything he does, the pain/suffering that you experience is for a purpose. At the end of the day, your character is moulded & it helps us grow as a person and also in our spiritual walk with God. it's only those who have experienced certain disappointments in their lives who later on experience greater breakthroughs with God.

when i look back at some of my disappointments in life, i realise everything had a purpose and it's amazing how God works:

1. i used to score really badly for chemistry in JC and hardly understood a word my chemistry teacher said. He was so frustrated with me, he made me summarize 2 chapters for him (no one in class had to do it except me). that was no joke because i remember one chapt had like close to 20+pages, and the words weren't exactly large in any sense of that word. in fact, it was quite a darn right puny. he tormented me in laboratory lessons as well, constantly standing right in front of my table, going "ah...ah...see! so clumsy" when i fumbled.

i was so angry and upset that i pushed myself hard. i got tuition for chemistry & when i got back my A level result slip, guess what...i got an A (with a smirk on my face). My only A in A level. lol.

and that eventually got me into a good faculty in NTU.

what made it such a sweet victory was the fact that i had done so miserably for the subject before....because of the disappointments, the happiness i felt from just getting an A for the subject was exceptionally great.

2. i used to have really bad horrid stage fright back in secondary school and JC. i remember a time when i had to stand in front of the entire class for a debate session & my hands were shivering so badly, my friend had to hold up my script for me. it was embarrassing. there were countless of times when i struggled with the fear of facing the crowd. But because of this fear, i push myself harder, i literally force myself into situations where i have no choice but to stand in front & sing/speak/play for the audience.

and now i guess i've grown more confident of myself, in a way i never knew i could be when i was young. of course i still get the jitters when i go on stage but i'm much less scared than i used to be, at least my hands don't tremble so much that i can't read the words on a script held in my hand!

3. all the while i felt like i should have gone to architecture or done some design course instead of going into Accountancy. i hated the subject. like cats to dogs.

but it hit me recently that if i had gone to archi or some design school, i would have continued being ignorant of the world or how markets work. i live a very sheltered life and for me, i never felt the desire to know about practical things like managing my finance, knowing how the economy works & what not. I realised that maybe God wanted to put me in an environment where i will learn to be aware of what makes the world tick, how economies run...or to be it bluntly, God probably wanted me to be a little less ignorant. He wanted to put me in a place where i have to train myself to keep abreast of current issues, surround me with people who have a mind for numerics & current affairs.

today i believe that i'm less ignorant and more aware of how money works. i'm still a dreamer (it's something that will always be part of me) but i'm now more equipped with the practicality that comes with living in a city runned by so many financial institutions.

God is truly amazing i think. i had this realization not long ago and after all the years of hating the course, i come to realise God's intentions. And i'm thankful now for being placed where i am.

"So for those who think that they're in the wrong place at the wrong time, think again. You just might be in the right place at the right time, you just don't know it yet."